Your choice – career vs loved ones
If given a chance to work abroad for long period of time, will you take it even if it means leaving your loved ones behind for many years? This was the question which confronted me when my friends asked me why didn’t I consider working permanently in the UK last time. It was not a difficult decision for me but I can tell you, it can be a very tough one for some people.
Let’s look at the 2 options we have here.
- The job could be your dream job with dream pay and with good salary. Everything about the job is good. But it’s in the States which means you will be 12 hours away from your family. And you can’t migrate all of them over. It’s just not feasible and pretty impossible. You can only fly back to visit them once in a while (since flight ticket is not really cheap). So will you leave your family behind and go for this dream job?
- Or do you think that no matter what kind of dream job you have been offered abroad, family and loved ones will always come first. Who knows what might happen in the next few years? Maybe you won’t get to see your aging parents or maybe your Miss or Mr Right (your life companion) will not wait for you that long? Will you abandon that dream of yours in order to stay put and be with your loved ones?
I think the option you choose will largely depending on what kind of person you are, whether you are more of a career person or a family person. And when you make this kind of decision, don’t consult other people because they will make you more confused. For some, money and prospect are above everything else so they will definitely tell you to go for the job. What could be worse than rejecting an opportunity that thousands of people failed to get? And for some, they are just not as adventurous. To them, what could be worse than living alone in a foreign land?
But at the end of the day, you should ask nobody but yourself. Because only you know what you want in life. I’ve seen and heard people who regretted going abroad when they realized they did not get back in time to see their critically-illed dad/mum – and yes, this kind of regret would carry on forever for most people. But I’ve also seen people enjoying themselves in foreign countries and living their dreams.
For me, I just can’t stand to see my family sad. They will never say No if I were to ask for their opinion because no parents would want to be an obstacle to their children’s future. But I also know that most parents would want their children to be around them. That is why I chose to stay here and learn to appreciate what we have around us. After all, opportunities are still there for the taking and dreams are still achievable irregardless of where you are.
nice one, alvin
When our ancestors migrated from China, many of them didn’t really have a choice. It’s get on that boat or starve. We can ask about choice today becoz we have a choice. In my case, my folks made that choice for me to grow up in a country half a world away with my aunt but it worked out fine.
If you are single, its easier to decide because the lineage stops at you. But if you are married, you’ll be stuck with trying to balance between giving your kids a fair future and being there for your parents. Sometimes you can’t have both without some sacrifice involved, usually money for air travel. Life’s like that.
I live by this code ,
Make money in Malaysia .
Overseas are for holidays , not work
gapnap´s last blog ..Gila Gig
@Usha
Thanks again Usha
@Damien Tan
We are really fortunate now that we are spoilt for choices. And of course, this post doesn’t really apply to those w/o choices. For them, there will only be 1 choice which is more feasible than the rest – as you said, do or die.
But if you do have choices like most of us do in this country, it’s up to you which one is more important to you. I think every parent would want their kids to do well and don’t mind sending them off half a world away….even though they are sad to do so – as most never come back after that. The decision should rest solely on the child himself…whether to go or to stay with the family….. or if they’ve went there……whether to come back and take care of the loved ones.
@gapnap
Even if our country is plagued with a lot of controversies, i really think there are still a lot of opportunities around.
Same for me!
My wife is actually relocated to Europe for 1 year then later 2 years in China. Given the options whether I should follow or not, I have decided to stay in Malaysia. Good thing is I still can visit her for 5 times per year (pay by the company).
ChampDog´s last blog ..What Determines the Value of Money?
@ChampDog
Because if you follow, your life might change a lot since the culture is pretty different. For me, I doubt I will ever like China (i’m now in China for vacation).
I think at the end of the day, depends on individual. Distance relationship is never easy to maintain. But not impossible. Perhaps people like me are not so suited for such long distance stuff
At least you still have the 5 times..not too bad
its like 2 months once.
ohhh!!! alvin u in China…diam2 sana…u know what i want right??? heheheheh
))
regarding your this post…mm…is so true. I actually have confusing in making that choice which i still have yet to make the decision.
by choosing 1st option, u earn much money and with money many impossible becomes possible. i mean many but not all ok.what if the 2nd option, u stayed back but didnt like the job? staying back with your love one doesnt mean you will be happy about it when you are going through difficulties in your job and other possible happenings.
I know our country has a lot of opportunities but are we taking into account on all general stuffs like the working environment, mentality, human rights, the working law?
i am going so deep now..LOL!
you are right that in the end of the day, it still comes back to yourself. It is about how could one stand or think on a situation & react.
ladylike´s last blog ..Buka Puasa @ Asia City
@ladylike
oh ya, have to get it fr my friend. but this time not very nice lo. cannot find nice one in the place i went =_= sorry.
mmm i think there should b a solution. u can always get a job u like and at the same time be with ur family. earning money is another thing. for me, earning money is important, but there are many things that money can never buy back. if u r good, money can be earned anywhere.
mm country? wait till u work in other countries
i think malaysia is still quite okay. not the best but definitely not the worst. i’m in china now, and i am very very grateful i am born in malaysia and not china. 